A new day job, and about a ton of new grocery stores, delis, bakeries around where I work to look for Black and White Cookies. On the way to the subway, I stopped into RANDOM DELI-BAKERY-GROCERY-STORE-PLACE-THAT-ALSO-HAS-PIZZA (there's like 100 of them around their) called "Amici" and saw a "brand" (?) of Black and White Cookies. Just shrinkwrapped with a price label on it.
I wonder where these come from? I've always had this sinking feeling that I am unknowingly reviewing the exact same black and white cookies (when they aren't brand names), like they all pretty much come from the same place.
So I bought this nameless cookie and managed to find time during the week (which is very difficult now) to eat it.
I thought it would be fun to take a tour of my journey to eating cookies!!!!!
First I am sitting in my chair in front of my computer. I get hungry and realize I'm not eating cookies at the moment. Something must be done!
So I go towards my door! So the door hasn't been touched since I was 12 or so. That's a Radioactive Man Meets Bartman poster, with bird poop all over it (my bird sits on top of the door all the time), and also Beavis and Butt-head stickets and Halloween cartoon stickers, an Addams Family bumper sticker, Superman, Batman, Ghost Rider, and Wolverine stickers. On the other side is a Kids in the Hall Braincandy poster, a They Might Be Giants sticker, 2 props from one of my student films (the fake dollar bill and the Knife Job Application), and a penny I scotchtaped to my wall for reasons that are only my own.
Look down the stairs! Inviting? Hey I like this picture.
This leads to the LIVING room. You can see a big comfy chair, and a big comfy TV.
Then I look in the mirror and hate myself. NEXT.
I walk through the dining room to...
THE KITCHEN. Source of both pain and pleasures.
The refridgerizer is opened so I can get some milk. Next to milk is whip cream. Hopefully I won't be too tired and mix up which one I take.
Then I take a glass. Shit, they're all upside down. How am I gonna pour the milk in?
Then I go through the "junk" drawer and take some Oreos and Pretzel Fish, because eating a giant chocolate and vanilla cookie isn't satisfying enough for a disgusting diarrhea factory like myself.
Then I look at myself again and feel sad.
OK so I finally sit down, and I bite the cookie.
Oh my god. I'm not gonna lie, I have 5 different sets of notes from cookies I've eaten for this blog, and I don't remember which one is this cookie. I feel like a slob. This was eaten a week ago. I'm such a fucking moron.
Ok, I think I found the right piece of paper (i write these notes on scraps of paper) on my floor. Ah, yes, this is the one.
Vanilla -- it tasted weird. Kind of like a butter cookie. Very very buttery and different. Not great, but buy it anyway, cause it's a cookie don't ya know?
Chocolate - it was good, king of like chocolate ice cream.
I could barely finish it. My appetite isn't what it used to be now that my schedule is all different.
I was finishing up the last few bites...
But holy...what the...?? Barbecue sauce??
I taste BARBECUE SAUCE.
What more can be said?
I'm falling asleep anyway. No more 4 AM cookie blogs. I'm on an unfathomably shockingly awfully exhaustingly early schedule now.